I Am Utterly At A Loss For Words. Seriously, There Is No Way To Make A Parody Of This Because, Well, You'll See...

From USA Today:

"Meanwhile, in another bizarre development, the husband of actress Zsa Zsa Gabor told the Associated Press that he had a decade-long affair with Smith and that he may be Dannielynn's father. "If you go back from September, she wasn't with one of (the other two men), she was with me," said Prince Frederick von Anhalt in an interview Friday. He said he would file a lawsuit if Dannielynn is turned over to either Stern or Birkhead. "

Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband is claiming to be the father of Anna Nicole's baby. I have no comment at all. There is nothing I could say that could make this more bizarre. Nothing.