And Again, The Future We Were Promised. But It's OK, Because I have My Personal Jetpack. Oh, No. I Don't.

Miami Go Go!

Quote Of The Day

"She's in such a whirlwind; she's in a tornado. I mean, we're talking serious earthquake, you know?"

-Dina Lohan, commenting on daughter Lindsay

Let's Meet And Have A Baby, Now

And Now...Dream Hospital

Truly a miracle of modern technology! I am especially fond of "baby in a drawer."

House Of The Future

I'll bet you didn't know that the house of the future would be made of plexiglass. Also, the house of the future will have a "poison shelf". Another thing you didn't know.

In Addition

That video makes me think of Chicago. Chicago has totally gothic architecture. And I have actually been in that rain storm in Chicago, with the lake looking just like that.

Within Temptation

So, Rhys made me realize that this is the greatest band ever. I'm serious, the best.

Quote Of The Day

"Why does everyone keep telling me I have to take care of Britney? Britney, Britney, Britney! She's an ex girlfriend! Doesn't anyone get it? 'We're not together anymore. I am so totally over her!"

- Justin Timberlake

Yma Sumac, Again

A Picture Of Yma Sumac

I Love Yma Sumac

But until today, I did not know that her real name is:

Zoila Augusta Emperatriz Chávarri del Castillo.

Way better than Yma Sumac, in my opinion.

When Was Flying Fun?

When it used be a cocktail party in the sky, that's when!

River Dance!: It Never Ends!

On Saturday I got to work for the LEO at a very fun event at The Kentucky Arts Center. I got to see Varla Jean Merman, who does a one-man performance-art in drag.

Yes, I know, drag shows are so 1997. But this was not a drag show. It was a cabaret show. It was hysterically funny. Fast-paced, quick-witted and original. Definitely a must-see.

On the same night, in the other theater in the Kentucky Arts Center, there was a performance of "River Dance". Both shows started at the same time, 8:00pm.

At 9:15, the Varla Jean Merman show was over and the crowd was headed for the bar for a lavish after-party.

And yet, River Dance was still going on, and thanks to the magic of the 500 flat screen TV's in the lobby, we all got to watch it. And watch it. And watch it.

9:30, still going on. Diddley-diddly-diddly-dee.

9:45, still going on. Deedley-doo, deedly-doo.

10:00 pm, still clacking away.

By this time, the Varla Jean Merman autograph signing was over, her audience was getting drunk, and we were all screaming at the flat screen TV's, "Stop, stop! Go away! Stop whirling and twirling to the haunting melody of the nose-horn! Stop stomping and clacking and leaping and kicking!"

But, alas, they did not stop.

It was 1o:30 before the easily-awed crowd stumbled out into the night raving about the Endless Irish Spectacle that they had just seen.

Of course, I had to call Kathleen at one point to beg her to use her powers to make it stop. She sadly informed me that the Evil Powers of the River Dance could not be stopped, and that she, too, had at one time in her life been forced to endure 1,000 hours of seemingly disjointed legs dancing to endless pipes and harps.

None of the River Dance audience ventured over to our little avant-garde booze party.

It was probably better that way.

Sorry For The Lack Of Posts

I was very busy this weekend. I worked quite a bit for the LEO. And then today, I caught David's "cough" and felt like crap all day. Plus I have been working on my new My Space page, so I can be just like all of the other kewl kids.

Blecch.

You know, there was a time in my life when spending an entire afternoon marching in a St. Patricks's Day Parade, followed by working a booth at an arts center, followed by seeing a live stage show, followed by an after-show cocktail reception, all accompanied by alcohol, would have been a walk in the park for me. That time is not now. I was beat down today.

But I have to let you all know about the great show I saw, and about "River Dance!: It Never Ends!", which was playing opposite us.

I'm working all day tomorrow, plus a visit to the Medieval Barber, so it may be tomorrow night (Monday) before any updates.

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

Today Lindsay Lohan sent another of her rambling emails in which she chastizes Britney Spears and tells her that trying to hang yourself from a light fixture with a bedsheet is "immoral". You know you have sunk to the bottom when you get lectured by Lindsay Lohan on morals.

In the meantime, Kevin Federline has shaved his head to show he supports Britney, while Simon Cowell has publicly stated that the only thing wrong with Britney is that she's a spoiled brat with delusions of talent.

And, our old friend Nicole Richey went to the hospital for "dehydration". I guess dehydration is the new exhaustion.

I mean, seriously, how is that I have gone all of my life without knowing a single person who has collapsed from dehydration or exhaustion? Oh, wait, now I remember. It's because they were dehydrated and exhausted from having done too much booze and too many pills. So we called it "partying too much".

Tomayto, tomahto.

Joe Wants To Know If I am Colorblind

Actually, yes I am, when it comes to blues and greens! Sometimes I see green where others see blue, which I suspect is what happened here, and why I did not get the fact that the costume is a BIG BLUE DRINK! That and the fact that I saw it late at night. And was half-crocked.

I also see the yellow traffic light as brown. I have always called it brown, never yellow.

Joe Wants To Know: "What Is Wrong With This Halloween Costume?"

Nothing.

This Is Why Bats Don' t Like Tornadoes. They Don't Like To Be All Swirly And Upside Down

The Sky Is Pretty And Blue With Little Fluffy Clouds But We Have Been Warned And The Wind Is Somewhat Ominous

You Know, Insomnia Sucks

I woke up, wide awake at 2:45 am. David is sound asleep. He's the opposite of insomniac.

Apparently my son has inherited not sleeping. Rhys says he frequently stays up all night. Without drugs. What's the point of that?

Anyway, here's a nice picture.

Y Ahora Noticias Escandalosas. Pues, La Madre de David House me dijo que son escandalosas. Pero ella es puta mentirosa. Entonces, quien sabe?